Constants with change
Thoughts on visiting my family after nearly 2 years.
Hi, hi, hi!
I recently came back to San Francisco from a short visit to British Columbia and a weekend at Disneyland. Travelling during the pandemic induces my airport anxiety. I have this constant fear that I don't have all of my required travel documents and that I'll get denied entry to either Canada or the US.
Anxiety aside, it was so nice to attend my cousin's wedding, spend time with my family, and catch up IRL with my two best friends.
A constant with change pt. I
My trip back to BC wasn't planned out. There wasn't anything specific I wanted to see and do, besides eat food and partake in wedding festivities.
Half the time, I tagged alongside my mom as she ran errands around town. It was something I did often when I lived with her.
It felt comforting. Familiar.
Same experience, different perspective.
Back then, I saw it as something "I had to do". It was a real chore. But when I visited, I voluntarily went with her to pick up household supplies and buy groceries.
As mundane as it sounds, I was happy that was how we spent our time together during my stay.
A constant with change pt. II
At my cousin's wedding reception, I looked around at the tables that seated all 20-something of our cousins (I have a big family on my mom's side!).
Here they were, the kids I grew up with. They taught me how to ride my bike. We ran around outside and played tag together. We'd have sleepovers and spend all night playing Pokémon Stadium, Mario Kart, and Goldeneye 007 on the N64.
But most of us are grown-ups now. The youngest ones are in high school (or approaching it). The older ones are in their 20s and 30s.
We don't see each other as often anymore. I've moved away, so it's even harder for me to spend time with them.
When I finished looking around the cousins' tables, I felt a sense of pride, joy, and bittersweetness.
A quick list of other updates:
😪 My body is still recovering from food and sleep imbalance after travelling.
🤗 I've befriended my next-door neighbour.
🐈⬛ My cat is currently on antibiotics and it's so stressful giving him meds.
Some helpful links:
📺 This video (What Are You Doing With Your Life? The Tail End) by Kurzgesagt inspired this post. I may or may not have cried while watching it.
🎶 Here's a lovely cover of Bill Withers' Just the Two of Us to brighten your day.
That’s all I got for now.
See you soon,
Mary 💖
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